Ok, I kinda had a melt down this past week.... So, then I start to get kinda depressed and very moody! And this is an email I sent out.
I know not everyone can understand why we have decided to adopted. And sometimes I question myself. And tonight was one of them. I was thinking
I'm soooo busy working, raising two boys, being a wife, friend , a daughter, sister and sometimes I'm selfish. I was making up excuses on why we shouldn't adopt.
And then I was looking at a blog of an adopted family..She had this link on her site.
So, at first I thought it was just a blog about abandoned children...Well, after a lot of tears...I don't think I should be questioning myself...
We are going to change a life...One that could have turned out to be on this link below...If we can change one thing in this world, it's a start!
http://abandoned-orphaned.typepad.com/paulmyhill/
So, in my melt down. I emailed our advocate Maria...And what she said kinda opened my eyes..I'm very thankful she is our advocate, God knew what he was doing....
She told me "Be emotional your paper pregnant! My God have ice cream and pickles or what ever, cry, be happy at the same time emotion is good. You are made after Gods image and even He had emotions."
Well I never thought about it that way..I haven't been this emotional well since I was pregnant with the boys. Oh boy does Danny remember that. The poor guy couldn't do anything right. :) Some of the guys at work was asking how the adoption is going..and his comment was "it's amazing she can't have biological children but she is going through the emotions, it's like her Mothering instinct has kicked in"
I would have never thought I would be this emotional. And sometimes I just can't stand myself...and that's bad :)
So, if another adoptive family reads this...Comments on the emotional roll coaster??? And how you have dealt with them. And handling comments about are you crazy for adopting? Because sometimes that hurts, you just want support..anyways :) I'm on my soap box again..
And I'm almost done shopping...grrr I usually am done by Nov., but like my older post I keep ending up in the baby section. The day to start baby shopping is coming soon...(I pray)
Monday, December 17, 2007
Tis' the Season to be..........
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5 comments:
Now this is funny. Last night I said to Ted that am I going to get through this adoption without a nervous breakdown--and he said "no, why would it be any different then other two?" Adoption is extrememly stressful--children are stressful-be they bio or adopted. But, it's a beautiful type of stress! Let the emotions out--enjoy this time.
Hey, I've been on that same roller coaster. I think it's only natural in our circumstances to question if we are doing the right thing. I'm going to have a 20 year old and a 2 year old. Who's the crazy one now? Like me, you have enough love to go around and what an incredible experience for your boys. When you see them all together, you will know that it was all worth it.
Hahaha! We've done it 3 times and each time is as special, as nerve wracking, as wonderful as the rest. Don't forget there is a little one out there with your name on it, and that is what it is all about. Are you going to rock the boat? Sure! Will your life change forever? Of course!
Trust me onh this one, not taking risks is higly over-rated. Put yourself out there, bust open that box you are in....the rewards are far beyond what you might ever imagine!
And since I am reading this on Referral Day, congratulations and I know this makes it a very special Christmas for you :-) Get through this stage and the worst is over with, really.
Warmly,
Cindy
Oh Johnda!! It is so emotional and SO much harder than being pregnant. Pregnancy has a lot of physical pain but adoption has so much more emotional pain--which is harder and which people don't understand. Lots of women have been pregnant and you can pretty much talk to any woman about that, but few and far between are the women who understand the "labor pains" of adoption. I'm with you, sister!! Eat some chocolate, read a sad boat, cry a little, read some blogs, cry some more. It's all GOOD!
Hugs,
Maria
ARGH -- I mean read a sad "BOOK" not a boat. See, just like pregnancy, the brain cells just GO!!!
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